< ![CDATA[  I step up to the castle wall. My hands are trembling, my stomach begins to turn, and I have this strange feeling of being so light the wind could scoop me up and throw me over the edge to my death on the land far below. I put my hand lightly on the wall and breath deeply, focusing on the blue sky above. I lean over, placing my stomach against the warm stones to try to take my weight off of my shaking knees. “Don’t be afraid,” I tell myself even though I know my fear of heights has never been calmed by those words. I then drop my gaze to the world below. And what do my eyes see? I see a land that I thought only existed in the pages of story books. Mountains curve up towards the sky in such an artistic way I have to stare for a while just to make sure they are real. The little valley towns are spread out like polk-a-dots as far as the eyes can see. I take another deep breath and find my fear beginning to fade. I begin to lean farther over so that I can see everything below me. I don’t want to miss a thing. Later that day I realized that my fear could have kept me from experiencing that. I could have robbed myself of seeing one of the most beautiful sites you could lay your eyes on. I have thought more on fear since then and realized that the only thing it does is cripple you. For instance, I never spoke to strangers before this trip...or at least not willingly. I kept my distance from those who looked even the least bit strange to me. Why? Not even I can say for sure. Perhaps it had something to do to with movies and the media of today that seem to teach us to fear all that is different and unknown. But that doesn't work on a trip like this. I have been constantly thrown into situations in which I have had to speak to people I was unsure of or who did not speak the same language as I do. The more I did that, the more I relaxed and began to go up to people on my own and start conversations that have never failed to be anything less than wonderful. I have met so many people that way and will always carry those conversation with me as long as I live. Many different people have taught me many different things and I have become a better person for it. Every person has something to say...you just have to listen. That mind set seems to have been lost somewhere in recent history. Which is sad, really, because now that I have had the privilege to meet and talk with people from all over the world I realize that we all live on one earth and we all share the same creator and can all relate to each other in one way or another. Whether it is a local couple in Nova Scotia, or a group of African sculptors in England, or an Army wife at a base in Germany, there is this universal offer of friendship that we can either choose to accept and be blessed by, or we can turn and hide from because we are too afraid to accept something that we have to come out of our shells for. I can only hope that this realization will open many doors for future opportunities. Now, after cycling for over 2 months and getting the feel for real outdoor travel, there is no turning back. I will forever be bound to the winding road. However, this kind of travel is not a spur of the moment kind of thing. You don’t wake up one morning and decide you are going to go on a three month trip to the other side of the world then pack-up and leave the next morning. There are quite a few tasks you need to master before you leave...I knew almost none of them before I left. Hand washing? Do people still do that? Cook over a camp stove? Do you want me to burn down the campsite? Put up an entire tent all by myself? I kind of need to sleep. Sew my ripping sleeping bag? Yeah...if you want me to ruin it. You want me to give you CPR if you are dying by the side of the road? HAHA. You want me to eat that? However, With the help of my parents, the Millers, and a plump first-aid teacher, I have accomplished things I would have never even thought possible before. Not because they were complicated tasks but simply because I thought myself incapable. I learned fast that if I wanted to make my dreams of travel a reality I would have to start believing in myself. I focused on being diligent and not taking the easy road out when things were difficult for me. I taught myself to put my head down and focus on whatever it was I was trying to accomplish. If I had worked hard, and diligently, on something to no avail I would ask the Millers to show me, not do it for me, but to show me how to do it so that I could achieve it the next time I tried. I have become much happier for it too. I no longer feel inferior, or incompetent, which I think are two of the worst feelings in the world. I am also much more self sufficient. Which is a good thing at my age. When I think about Europe the first thing that comes to mind is history. This continent is packed full of history, everything from the middle ages to WWII. I have sat in the prison chamber of Anne Boleyn. I have ridden to the farthest extent of the Roman Empire. I have seen the town of my favorite artist, Vermeer. I have walked the hellish Nazi concentration camp, Buchenwald, and seen the places that claimed thousands of lives. How many American teenagers can say that? And though each place is different, they have all brought one very interesting thing to my attention, which in many ways makes events of today make more sense. That is, that the actions and decisions of people from the past still have a heavy impact on the things of today. When I was in the Anne Frank house, in Amsterdam, I read a quote by her father ,Otto Frank. The quote explained that in order for us to build a better future we have to understand the past. I found my self re-reading the quote over and over again. I then realized that the history I was seeing first hand was more important than I had previously thought. As a young person it is important for me to understand the cause and effect of previous decisions made by historical figures, so that I can make intelligent arguments against what I know to be wrong and to be able to vote for leaders with historical perspective as to not repeat the mistakes of the past. It is my job as a citizen to be involved with international issues, and this trip has taught me to understand many different cultures and their governmental structures. One morning while we were stealth camping (Mrs.Miller’s phrase for free camping), I was sitting in the valley while the others were still sleeping silently in their tents; the first rays of sun were dripping over the mountains like honey leaking over the side of a jar. I sat there letting the sunlight creep up on me and dry my dew soaked feet. I looked up and down the field which was divided by a fast moving stream. It was close to the end of the trip and with my many new self realizations I felt a sense of ease wash over me. I no longer wanted to be someone else, I was totally content with being me. I was finally was able to accept who God made me to be and was ready to live out the rest of my life doing God’s will. I understood that like each plant and animal in God’s creation, each person has a certain job, each unique according to the individual gifts and abilities. Without this trip I do not know if I would have come to this realization, which God knew of course. I truly believe that he called me to take this trip for that reason. He knew what would reach me and it has. Who knows what he has in store for me next, all I know is that with this under my belt I will be ready and more than willing to take on whatever he has in store for me next.]]>